Written just after midnight on February 11th, 1999...
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Did you ever get to that point where you're just tired of people? Sometimes I think the world would be better if we had some sort of mute button installed in all of us for when we're about to say something stupid or private. Right now I'm just reeling in general because of a lot of little things. Having something chucked at my head because someone doesn't like what he's heard isn't exactly how I wanted to spend this evening. Really, I was in a great mood until then.
In some ways it's actually really good that the incident occured. I didn't get hurt. More importantly, he showed me what an ass he can be. It makes it a lot easier to see him and not miss him as much now. I'm having a good time now, really. My writing is getting better, school is moving along steadily, I'm making new friends, and doing quite a bit of dating. Rarely do I think of him anymore. The only way he can get to me is when he shows up and says or does something childish. It's as much my fault as it is his. I end up at those places too. If I tried, I could avoid seeing him. Of course, that would be cutting out a lot of friends along with him. This cuts both ways, though. He wouldn't behave so stupidly if my presence didn't bother him so much. In all fairness he apologized for being an ignorant jerk. If he'd meant it, that would be different. We both know he said it only because other people were present. I know... it's a stupid, meaningless thing to write about. In a few days I'll forget all about it and him until the next time we see each other. Eventually he'll have no more of an effect over me. Truth be told, I'm quite anxious for that day to get here. |